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Essay: An Account of My "Christos" Experience
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AN ACCOUNT OF MY "CHRISTOS" EXPERIENCE by Bill Leithhead, May, 1991.


Early in May, 1991, I spent a weekend with six others of my Cairnmillar group in a mobile home in Tocumwal, NSW. Amongst the shared events of that weekend was my experience on a Friday night of a unique procedure which the group leader, John Bevan, calls the "Christos Experience" after a book's author who described the altered state of consciousness which was induced in me as follows...

The Process

As I lay in a dimly-lit room, relaxed, with my eyes closed, John vigorously massaged my forehead ("brow chakra", or "third eye"), whilst Peter Hock massaged my ankles. I experienced a numbing, tingling feeling, and I voluntarily entered into a meditative state which was quite quickly surprisingly deep, with a dissociative element to it, as though my physical body had become simply an adjunct to my real existence.

The Group: Judith, Myself, Jeane, Yuri, Peter, John, [Anne (photographer)] John asked me to visualize my legs becoming a little elongated, and than normal again, followed by a similar elongation of my neck, which I found I could visualize quite well. Following John's suggestions, I found I could make my body grow longer and longer, and than expanded into the space of the room. About this point I began to experience the "I" as spacially mobile, with my physical body simply "there", as just a somewhat irrelevant attachment.

I recall John asking me to be near the ceiling, and then to move outside the mobile home into the night air, reporting my experiences as I did so. At this point, I felt "on the line" as to whether I was visualizing or imaging the experiences, because I needed to describe the night sky. It had been overcast and cloudy, and I would have to "guess" whether I could "see" the stars: right then, I had to let go of any imagining, and "be there". I somehow "knew" that the stars were visible, and confidentially described these and the caravan park at night, from a height.

Following John's instructions, I moved up above the township, higher and higher, describing what I saw and experienced of the countryside spread below me in the starlit darkness, until there was merely a dark, vague vista below, with little smudges of light here and there where the townships were. I felt safe, comfortable and confident, although vaguely aware of the deep chill of the night air at height.
The Group: Judith, Myself, Jeane, Yuri (dec.), Peter, John, [Anne (photographer) - not visible.

But somehow, I was simultaneously aware of my physical self lying on the floor among my friends, and could flip in and out from one state to the other with ease. Several of my friends were a bit tiddly from wine, and were talking and giggling amongst themselves, but somehow this was not a disturbance to me. I made a joking remark or two to them, and then was quite easily again high above the landscape.

Further following John's instructions, I ascended high above the planet and gazed at the mottled bluish glow, describing what I saw, which was rather indistinct at this point. And then I travelled further, wherever I chose, until I described aloud to John and my group companions. The following is an account of that place.

My Destination

I am standing up to my ankles in a cool, sparkling stream which gushes merrily over coloured stones and pebbles. My body is warmly bathed in the bright sunlight flooding through lush bushes and forest gently fringing the water's edge. I feel at home.

Then I see an open space: I am gazing into the eyes of a young woman with grey, grey eyes and straight, brown hair so long that it cascades down her back. We are very much at ease together - very close.

In response to John's questions, I sense that here I am far into the future, maybe one or two thousand years hence, and in an earth-like environment. I say a "future" because this is one of an infinity of possible futures for me. I also sense that we, here, have quite dark skins, like a heavily sun bronzed colour; our skin is also quite thickened, and yet not insensitive. We seem to wear clothing of sorts, but very little of it.

Now I am in a building, rounded in shape, and partly open to the open air. It is made of beautiful wood with the natural grain and textures of the timber carefully chosen to harmonize with the eye and with the spirit. Where possible, whole tree trunks and branches have been used in the walls, roofing and simple furnishings, to preserve flow and shapes of the timber pieces, because here we know that this is important - to allow our living environment to resonate smoothly together with our own life situations.

I am an artist - a sculptor and a painter: there are some pieces of my work in the round building, which is my workshop.

My sculptures are of wood, which I work mainly with my own hands, rather than tools. Somehow, I am able to channel energy into my hands which enables me to cut things, to chip and smooth and to finish the natural timber into smooth, curved shapes. They are unique, since there are not many of us with this gift. When others touch and handle my sculptures, they experience my personal aura meshing with theirs, so that each sculpture allows me, the artist, to communicate in a deep way with the recipient.

My paintings are done on flat sheets of some rigid material. The media I use are substances like "liquid crystals". Viewed dispassionately, they appear like metallic colours, ranging from reflective mirror white, through various shades of grey (with a sheen), to pretty well black, with various hints of colours in zones and swirls, like a bubble in sunlight. In themselves, these are quite pleasant, but when a picture is viewed deliberately and freely, it transmits my aura to that of the viewer. When this happens, each picture becomes animated with the personal aura energy which I have incorporated into it as I painted it.

Into some, I include love-energy, into others, joy-energy, sometimes laughter, sadness-wistfulness, or perhaps I use a little playfulness-energy, such as a clown or "trickster", - or even erotic-sexual energy: there is usually some little surprise for the viewer-recipient of my work!

But each viewer plays his or her part, too, because my "liquid crystal" aura paintings are also sensitive to the viewer's aura, so will be seen differently by each person. Each painting displays its delightful shimmering colours and shapes according to the way in which my own aura and my own different personal energies have been incorporated into it, but also to the response to the viewer's own aura. Thus, each painting is ever-changing but a beautifully responsive meeting point between the viewer and my absent self.

In this place, people communicate mainly by telepathy, even over great distances. But although we can converse together wordlessly, we do understand the positive and harmonious influence of sound vibrations on the human mind, body and spirit; hence we use sounds in various kinds of singing sounds to each other, with much greater effect emotionally than speech alone.

We are mainly self-sufficiently communities, completely vegetarian. Crops of grains, vegetables and fruits, and fibre plants, are grown, but, like the Findhorn community in Scotland (in this present time), we work in close harmony with nature. Through contact with low-level spirit entities associated with plant, insect and animal life, which are called "elementals", we co-exist symbiotically with nature; in reality we are not separate from "nature", but take our place as an integral part of all that there is.

Although the people plant, cultivate and harvest the crops, the plants themselves are regarded as important members of the community, who in a spiritual partnership of mutual love and care, grow themselves healthily and strongly towards their final goal as providers of food and clothing for the people. Because our community is attuned to the whole life force, plant diseases, and insect and animal pests are not a problem, since we live in harmony with these elementals, too, so they avoid injuring our crops.

Sex is called "mingling", and thus partners are called our "minglers" - I suppose in the sense of mingling bodies, genetic material, and our psyches and spirits in partnership. The grey-eyed woman with long brown hair is my "co-mingler".

At this point, I experienced a curious sense of telescoped time: not unlike a speeded-up video, but rather involving an inner recognition that time is relative, and is in fact an illusion. Thusly, I experienced almost simultaneous experiences of having children, then of their maturation, having children of their own, and so on. Meanwhile, the woman and I are ageing more and more, and later on we will die.

Death is not a problem to us: we call it "fading". We know it is not the end, but merely a doorway, about which we have no fear; but we certainly experience sadness and loss. Disease is not a problem, because we live in harmony with our bodies and the external environment, with the surrounding life elementals, and with our own spiritual essence. It seems that we just age and "fade" naturally.

I really only know about my own community but there seem to be no major cities: the little communities seem to be scattered over a very wide area, but quite closely situated. I know of no major road systems, no vehicles, but there is a network of tracks through woodland, which people use for a little trading, but mainly for going to communion gatherings at different communities.

There doesn't seem to be any hierarchical authority structure, nor any necessity for this, as we are cooperative and bound together by our auras and our telepathy, both within and between communities. By these means, we recognize our simultaneous individuality and our universality as different aspects of our experience of existence.

There is in our community a larger building where we can all gather to have "communion". We call it this not in a "religious" sense, (as there is no religion as such), but as a place wherein we can all gather together at one time to experience the "group aura". we know, too, that our psyches are strongly affected by setting and ritual, so as an aid to our communion we don specially-woven robes to help us experience the marvellous community-bonding effect of our own group aura.

My Return

During all of the above experiences , I was also simultaneously aware of my friends around me. I suspect they had become a bit bored with this and were noisily engaged in giggling and banter, well-lubricated by food and wine. Fortunately, all this had little effect on the intensity of my experience.

John left me quiet at this point, and suggested I return to my body when I felt ready. Reluctant as I was to leave that beautiful otherness, I soon found that although it wasn't cold, I began shivering quite violently, and my teeth began chattering. So I let go and returned gently to my usual here and now, began stretching, and opened my eyes to the interested gaze of my companions. Arising, I joined the group and its agendas.

I don't really know what my friends made of what they heard that night, but for me it was an intense, joyous experience of a beautiful place somewhere else, some other time. It remains with me still, and I am grateful for a glimpse of an existence which awaits me in due course if I choose to travel that pathway.

For now, I am further strengthened in my certainty that I can reach out to other souls, and they to me, and that in the due flux of what we call time, each in his or her own pathway, we will become aware that we are all the One - and always were.

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